Rule number 3: Find your sexy (yes, it’s up to you)

It starts with the undies, just because no one can see them doesn’t mean they’re not important, your bottoms shouldn’t be on the bottom of the list, and keep your tits at the top. Flirt with yourself first, and ditch those awful knicks.

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Love your undies, cause that’s where it all starts. When did you last buy yourself a new  crossover, or underwired; triangle, balconette, halterneck, backless, strapless, Queen size, king-size; push-up, or squash-down; T-back, or light n lacy; comfy but sassy bra? And matching knickers? Briefs? G-string? Spanks? Pants? Anything?

WELL, WHY THE HECK NOT?

Modelling bras, (whilst telling myself ‘it’s just like wearing a bikini on a beach’), for a shoot for The Daily Mail…oddly.. all about bras…

 

Finding the right bra

So girls. Rule number 3: find your sexy.

It starts with the undies, just because no one can see them doesn’t mean they’re not important, your bottoms shouldn’t be on the bottom of the list, and keep your tits at the top. Flirt with yourself first, and ditch those awful knicks.

I don’t care if you’re happily single, unhappily married or vice versa; unhappy with your entire image, or all right with some bits of your body – YOUR BODY, the one you’ve had for ages now, the one that’s been with you through thick and thin – you’ve gotta love it. This body of yours is not going anywhere, so you’d better start fully appreciating ALL of it from now on in. Don’t “hate my feet” or “despise my tummy” or insult your tits, “they’re just empty tea-bags,” “pendulous and baggy”; or any other part of you, “my arse is keeping my ankles warm”, “the dimples on my knees have dimples”,”I have no neck”, “I’m just so scrawny” etc.

STOP IT. 

ENOUGH.

Your imperfections are what make you perfect. So love all of them, despite size, shape – lumpy and bumpy; skinny or bony; whatever non-conformist or haphazardly put together person you feel you are, you gotta love it

 

bless this mess
Happy with who I am

BLESS THIS MESS T-Shirt

You’re unique and wonderful, no mater how far along the spectrum you feel you’re away from the standard ‘expected’ sizes and assets, I think you are beautiful. Most of you reading this are over 45, you’ve therefore been here long enough to recognise that this is it. This is what you’ve got. There’s no point in hating it; or hating any little, bad or big, bits of it.

(I know & love that there are many of you out there who are already fully loving and appreciating your bodies for what they are: this isn’t really an article for you).

But for those of us who may have lost a bit of lust with ourselves…well, we need to rediscover and

find our sexy.

I’m not saying this in order for you to attract another – that may well be a by-product – but it all starts with you. The nurturing ‘my sexy’ is an easy thing to forget to do, especially as we get older, while we watch bits of our bodies slide towards the ground and other bits flourish outwards at a seemingly unstoppable rate.

No! Us fabulous 50s (& beyond) have all the more reason to make a proper conscientious effort to go buy some underwear that we love and feel fantastic in. You’re never too old to do this. When I make the effort (& it is indeed an effort) to wear lovely matching bra and knickers, I feel extra good.

I know my liddle secret.

Be in control with style control wear

It doesn’t matter if no one ever knows that on any particular day, I wore a stunning bra n’ knicks, because I got all the benefit myself. I do obviously appreciate that if I got run over… well, you know….same goes for hot date/non-private fitting rooms/wedding night/fire alarm drill at the gym etc.

But brilliant bras aren’t cheap. I HATE how much the really lovely ones cost. How dare they? For that tiny amount of triangle and elastic? Seriously? It’s the tailoring, I tell myself. Its the fit. Its the harmonious symphony of breast meeting brassiere. The prices are quite painful…but it’s okay, I say, buying yourself a beautiful bra tells you that you are worth it, every penny – which you absolutely are. I bought a few gorgeous bras and knicks, from the @ellemacpherson range, they still make me feel a million dollars, every time I wear them….but….shit, that was over 6 years ago now…..I need to take my own advice here…think I’ve def had my money’s worth now…time to refresh…

Elle gets it right….check this little puppy out, imagine wearing this bra whilst you’re walking around Sainsbury’s, your supermarket shopping would be so much more fun, just quietly inwardly knowing what you were wearing underneath….sooooo gorgeous beautiful bra

Another fabulous range is Intimissimi – lovely and reasonably affordable range…

But equally going to your nearest Primark or New Look and getting yourself a few new cheaper undies does the trick just as well – the result just doesn’t last as long (maybe one wash….5 if you’re lucky LOL) – but you still get a result. You know that you’ve got new underwear on and, oh boy, does that feel luxurious! Or am I the only one that doesn’t buy new underwear very often?? Oh lord….

I totally understand that this ‘loving your body’ biz, is no easy feat to achieve. After all, most of us, have spent a lifetime habitually hating at least one thing about ourselves. Yes, my hands could be a lot prettier; my skin a lot clearer, my waist a touch tauter etc etc, but they’re not, and they never will be what I see as perfect.

Accept what you have. What if I lost my hand in an accident? How much would I love it then? As a child, did you ever think to yourself, “what if I died? Then they’d be sorry!“? I have to admit, I’ve cried at my own imagined funeral a few times. Pathetic, I know. But true. Finally grew out of that one when I was about 16, thank god…although I admit, I’ve got my funeral music planned…so the funeral thoughts have never really totally gone away… I digress. Forget what others may think at your funeral! Think about how you feel now. If you’re feeling hot and gorgeous inside, then no one can take that away from you. Others may well also get the benefit of super sexy you, but YOU will get it the most.

So come on girls….I see you baby, shaking that arse…